Why sick people shouldn’t play with power tools…

I think I may have the first human case of Bird Flu in the United States. Well, ok, it’s more likely yet another recurrence of the recurring sinus infection I’ve been enjoying off and on (hence the “recurring” reference) since the beginning of November. Saying I have a sinus infection that just won’t go away, however, isn’t nearly as glamorous and prestigious as having the first case of Bird Flu in the U.S. would be, so until the blood tests prove otherwise, Bird Flu it is.

The point is, I’ve been sick all weekend. Coughing, aching, stuffy-head, fever…the whole damn Nyquil commercial. (Too bad I can’t take the stuff, but that’s a whole other blog posting!) I laid in bed all day yesterday and got absolutely nothing accomplished. I felt slightly better today – at least my temperature had returned to it’s usual 97.4 degrees – so  I started to feel guilty at not getting anything done this weekend. That’s when I decided it would be a great idea to wire my house for cable.  By myself. (Yeah, I know…I thought it would be a great idea to rearrange my bedroom – furniture and all – by myself the day after I had my wisdom teeth removed, too.)

When I bought this condo in December, it was only wired for cable in the living room. In order to watch television in my bedroom (which is my only option if I want to watch tv at all, considering I have a teenager permantly affixed to my living room sofa) I had to run a very attractive cable all the way down the hallway, over doorways, and into my room at the back of the condo. Now, I know what you’re thinking, I could just call Comcast and they would be more than happy to run cable into the bedrooms for me for a small fee. Or maybe a not-so-small-fee. Whatever the fee, I somehow got it into my head that it would be a simple enough job, so why pay Comcast? I went to Home Depot a couple of weekends ago and bought wall jacks and coaxial cable. A few days ago I bought a drill. I decided today was the day. I am quite sure that had I been getting a sufficient amount of oxygen to my brain, I would have realized what a bad idea this was. I blame it on the copious amounts of snot in my head.

I start moving furniture around in my bedroom so that I can get to the wall where I would like the jack to be. I get my handy-dandy little stud finder and make sure that it’s all clear. I pick up my drill and make a nickel-sized hole in the drywall. So far so good, right? Riiiight…

Well, the first thing I notice is that my drill is coming back with insulation on it, which shouldn’t really be there considering this is the interior wall between my bedroom and my daughter’s. But hey, ok, so there’s some insulation…no biggie…

I go into my daughter’s room and start rearranging her furniture so that I can get to the wall on this side. My theory is that I drill the hole in my bedroom, I drill a matching hole in my daughter’s room, and should then be able to easily pass the cable through the wall into my room, attach it to the back of the jack, screw the jack onto the wall, and voila! Cable in my room. Ha. Ha. HA!

I drill the hole in my daughter’s wall. It should be at precisely the same spot as the one on the other side, because I *measured* it and everything. So why then, when I shine my flashlight into it, am I not seeing my bedroom on the other side? I go back into my bedroom and try to shove the cable through that way. No go. It sounds as if it is hitting a solid wall. What’s the problem?

I decide that ok, I need to make my holes a little bigger so that I can see what’s going on here. It should still be ok because they’ll be covered up by the wall jack anyway. I proceed to do just that until I have two credit-card sized holes in our bedroom walls. And I still cannot see through the wall from one room to the other. I do a little research on the internet and find that most likely there is an extra fireblocking board going through the middle of the wall. One that my $19.90 drill from Target isn’t long enough to penetrate from either side of the wall.

So I swept up the mess, put the furniture back where it belongs. Now, not only do I have my incredibly ghetto-fabulous cable running from the living room to my bedroom, but I have two huge worthless holes in my wall as well. Next time I get sick, please lock up my power tools!!!

Damn Bird Flu!

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