I have been without an internet connection at home for 11 days now, and I’m fast learning that being without the internet is a lot like when your car is in the shop. You never really want or need to go anywhere in particular until you can’t! I can still remember a time when the internet didn’t exist, or if it did, it was only for the geekiest of the geeks with their old Commodore 64’s…
Anyway…I have started to make a list of all of the things I have wanted to do this week that require the internet…
- Check my email (of course)
- Play Sudoku. (I solved this problem on Day 4 or 5 without internet. I downloaded it while I was at work – after 5pm, of course! – and burned it onto a CD so that I could install it on my home computer.)
- Email my brother to ask him why my internet might not be working.
- Look up instructions on how to install the new kitchen light that I bought last weekend. (a.k.a. “How to electrocute myself in just 10 easy steps.”)
- Find out what time the tanning salon closes on Sunday (Yes, I know, you’re thinking I could just use the telephone. But how do you find their phone number without the internet?)
- Check the weather (I heard thunder. There could be a hurricane coming, and I’d never know it!)
- Research trips to Italy that I can’t afford. (Yes, I’m still thinking about “Under the Tuscan Sun”.)
- Download porn (oh wait, that’s Dave’s list. Sorry!)
- Visit comcast.com to sign up for internet service
- Visit verizon.net to sign up for internet service
- Visit aol.com to sign up for…oh who am I kidding? I’d rather die than do dial-up!
- Google “stolen wireless networking” to see if there is any way to restore my service
- Pay bills (I haven’t really fretted too much over that one)
- Reconcile my bank accounts (Did people really used to use paper check registers and wait until they got their monthly statement?)
- Look up whether my left palm itching meant I would be getting money or spending money.
- Add “Hoodwinked” to my Blockbuster Online list
- Read everyone else’s blogs. I have an excuse for not posting lately, but I expect everyone else to keep theirs up!
- Illegally download music.
- Check my horoscope to see if I will ever get my internet back!
I did finally cave and sign up for Verizon DSL…so hopefully it’ll be up and running by May 9th. Here’s the part I don’t get, though – Verizon says they will email me when the line is active and I can hook up my self-install kit. Now, if I am just signing up for service, how am I supposed to check my email???