Slow news day…

It’s late and I’m tired, so just a few bits of randomness…

  • “Larry the Cable Guy, Health Inspector” should be retitled “Larry the Cable Guy, Fart Projector”.
  • No good recipe has ever come from the Low Carb Cafe. I wondered why they called it “Slap Yo Momma Beef Stew”, and now I know. The rest of the title was accidentally erased. It should really read, “Slap Yo Momma IF SHE MAKES THIS Beef Stew.” Sorry Megan, I didn’t know! That’s what I get for looking at the rating…
  • I’m trying to figure this one out. Earlier today I asked the 13 year old if she had any homework. Her answer was an unequivocal “no”.  A few hours later, I found her on the couch in the living room doing Reading homework. My question is this – if you’re going to lie and say there’s no homework, shouldn’t that be because you don’t intend to DO the homework? Otherwise, what’s the point?
  • If you like to people-watch, the Unemployment Office is a great place to hang out. I should know. We spent 2 1/2 hours in their waiting room earlier today waiting to not testify in an unemployment hearing. Here are some of the things I saw there:
    • A woman with the oddest-shaped body I have ever seen in my life. It defies description other than “a butt shaped like a huge triangle”.
    • A man came out of the men’s room (thank goodness!) carrying a bottle of (what I hope was) apple juice.
    • A group of people came out of the conference room at lunch time presumably taking a break from some kind of training. As they migrated towards the front door, I heard a man ask one of the women in the group if she were married. It occurred to me that it might not be a good idea to be hitting on women AT THE UNEMPLOYMENT OFFICE! Come on dude, she already knows you don’t have a job.


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